Best and Worst "Strip Club Songs" and Other Crap

Yes loyal readers.. or reader.. Blog Boy is back with another entry with titillating stories, worthless advice and bad grammar. Last I blogged I mentioned that I was going to dedicate another entry to the establishment that nestles deep in the bosom of the American heart land, the strip club. A moment of silence please as we pay homage.

Ok enough silence. Let’s talk about music. Music at strip clubs. I promised you the best and the worst of strip club songs and here they are.

The key to a good stripper song is it has to be narrative, the song tells the stripier what to do, so you don’t have to and should be sung by artists that you know spend a lot of time at strip clubs and might have even written the song while getting a lap dance.
5. Get Naked by Methods of Mayhem (a underground hit that is very strip club worthy)

4. Shake Ass for Me by Eminem (it should be the national striper anthem, bow your head and put one hand on the left but cheek of the striper in front of you)

3. Do Me Baby by Bell Biv Devo (“slap it flip rub it down oh no”.. need I say more)

2. You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC (lyrically the best strip club song ever written, pay homage, give respect, try not to cry, out of your third eye)

1. Girls Girls Girls by Motley Crue (a song actually written to pay tribute to strip clubs. But what actually puts it ahead of these other very worthy songs is the band members, well not actually the members but the band members ex wives.. which include: Pamela Anderson, Elaine Irwin, Heather Locklear, Brandy Brandt, Heidi Mark and Donna D'Errico, ah yes great 80’s hair band, great looking women and enough stds to infect a small country).

Ok now the 5 worst strip club songs of all time.
5. It’s Raining Men by the Weather Girls (if you hear this song at a strip club.. your at the wrong strip club)

4. Dude Looks Like a Lady by Arrowsmith (not a fun game to play at a strip club, which dancer has the biggest adams apple, that is called the crying game)

3. Laughy Taffy by D4L (catchy tune bad image)

2. We Don’t Have To Take Our Clothes Off to Have a Good Time by Jermaine Stewart (oh yes we do, everything is more fun naked except for cooking baccon)

1. Can You Smell That Smell by Lynard Skynard (It should be like a meat market not a fish market)


Best strip club names: The Naughty Kitty, The Landing Strip (Right by the Airport),

Those are real here’s some Ideas for strip club names tell me what you think: The Beaver Damn, Strippers R Us, The International House of Stripers (stripers come with three different kinds of syrup) Boner’s Bistro

Bad names for strip clubs: The Crab Shack and The Canker Sore

Good striper names Pepsi, Boo Boo Kitty, Viagra, Areola and Chi Chi Rodrigues

Bad striper names: Peptol, Chlamydia, Anchovy, Halitosis, The Nutcracker

Well my blog time is up for now. Hope you enjoyed this homage to strip clubs. Tune in next time when I’ll tell you 10 things not to do with a pickle.